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I, Isaac Take Thee Rebecca:
Moving from Romance to Lasting Love
by Ravi Zacharias
Nashville: W Publishing Group, 2004
Reviewed by Patrice Fagnant-MacArthur
Ravi Zacharias was born in India and educated in Cambridge. Married thirty years with three grown children, he wrote this book to help young people pondering marriage to make good decisions. Upon starting this book, I braced myself for a very conservative view of marriage, especially as Zacharias began discussing how God created a woman to give companionship to a man. As the book continues, however, it becomes clear that the author is not advocating a secondary position for women, but rather an equal but different one. Zacharias alludes to the Trinity to explain his position: "There is also difference in the Trinity without inferiority."
Zacharias is honest about the struggles of marriage and the challenges of lasting love. He advises young people to take their parents' opinions into account when deciding to marry. He considers parents to be "wise guides" who have a child's interests at heart. While there are exceptions to every rule, Zacharias says a person must be twice as sure that one has made the right decision about a partner if one's parents are against it. He also cautions parents not to force their will on their children. One should never be forced or pressured to marry without his or her assent.
Zacharias also emphasizes the importance of the decision to love. When the feelings are tested, the will to love must remain. Love requires sacrifice. The author likens it to a daily death. "You must face your willingness to die to yourself before you choose to walk down the aisle. Is this person the one for whom you are willing to die daily? . . . Be assured that marriage will cost you everything." One gives up oneself in order to bring forth a new entity. One must serve the other with kindness.
I, Isaac, Take Thee Rebekah should be recommended reading for engaged couples. It is a no-nonsense look at marriage that both cautions and offers hope for the future. "Marriages that are Christ-centered are beautiful to behold and wonderful to enjoy. Romance as God intended it can last a lifetime."
© Spiritual Woman Press, 2005. All rights reserved.
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